Just in time

I remember as a child how long the month of December was. Now I wonder where the month went. I make a concentrated effort to eliminate unnecessary activities and protect our time. I am careful to direct our attention to charity and service. I want so much for it to be a sacred space of time in our year and in our lives. But still, the busyness. Homeschool combined with Braden's master's degree (plus a handful of other endeavors and commitments) left me feeling like I was dog paddling in the ocean. Not really drifting out to sea, but lacking solid footing on which to stand. I have the sense that I'm not moving forward so much as I am just trying to stay afloat. I found myself standing in the kitchen the day before Christmas preparing our traditional Au Jus, deeply wanting to feel connected to the Christmas spirit. Braden's classes were complete for the semester, our travels were complete, school was out for a week, and the shopping was done- including the stress of obtaining a surprise puppy. Our Christmas Eve festivities were hours away and I wondered if it was too late to be a part of that moving and transformative power of Christmas that I was yearning for. The one that has absolutely nothing to do with the gift giving of Christmas morning. I turned on what has become my favorite Christmas song- Hallelujah by Cloverton. Something about this video has resonated so profoundly within me. The simplicity of the surroundings perhaps? The video shows a cafe full of regular people listening to the words "hallelujah" being sung about the baby Jesus and our part in his eventual suffering. Everything about it is ordinary. The setting, the clothing, the people. In the absence of any especially attractive people, outfits, decor, or food, this group of people seem to all be feeling the same thing- reverence and adoration for a little baby who changed the world. The song is sung with a certain amount of ....desperation? It mirrored what I felt in my heart. In the middle of my ordinary busy life I was desperate to come together with my family and unite in our adoration of the baby Jesus. I didn't have time to decorate my house or cookies or gifts the way I wanted to, but I was intent on remembering the young couple who were asked to raise the Savior. To think about his life and his love for us. To think about His gift of redemptive love. I listened to this song on repeat all morning as I went about my tasks. I realized it wasn't too late to be filled with the special spirit of Christmas. In fact, I believe that is one of the most hopeful themes of the gospel- it is never too late. The opportunity to be filled with Christ's love is always there for the taking.